The verdict is in. I’m calling it. Two words that need to be separated in a rancorous divorce: fat and eat. As in, “I am so fat, I have to stop eating.” They get no visitation what.so.ever. It is THAT serious.
Here’s why. Last night I had dinner with Domestigal Sue, and that always promises two things: Sexiness and knowledge. Irresistible combo. I love that the naturally muscular Sue can spend time reading the NY Times while I sweat my days away at the gym like a real meat-head.
On our second round of sake she asked me if I’d heard about the stomach condom.
Ah, “the stomach what?” I shook my head side to side in disbelief. I coughed. Anyone looking at my fabulous self would have thought I was choking.
A condom for your stomach that will hold your food, instead of say, eating less. Grossly fascinating. But wait, there’s more. It is later removed through your mouth by a doctor.
The EndoBarrier™ is a gastrointestinal liner that acts as an impermeable barrier to prevent food from coming in contact with the wall of the intestine. This may have an effect on the patient's uptake of both nutrients and calories. It may also have a metabolic effect that is similar to Roux-en-Y gastric bypass surgery, which produces significant weight loss and resolution of type 2 diabetes. However, the EndoBarrier™ is placed and removed endoscopically. As with many endoscopic procedures, the EndoBarrier™ may provide a safer alternative with more rapid recovery and lower costs.
Why is this satisfactory? As obesity increasingly becomes the norm, society has grown too accepting. Perhaps what is lacking is the same thing that helped smokers lose their butts: a healthy dose of social stigma. If only there were more shame in being fat, maybe more people would be motivated to lose weight? I dunno. It’s just a thought.
Last week, a letter published in the Lancet noted that fat asses contribute more than their thinner compatriots to food scarcity and global warming, given that they eat more and require more transportation energy to move themselves around.
I went over my library, er, google and did some research. It rendered 386,000 results for “fat people cause global warming”.
In my opinion, the obese could use some blame, or responsibility, not a solution to be more of glutton. I mean, am I way off course here?
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
It’s actually more of an intestinal condom and it gets inserted and removed via your ass but it is equally absurd and frightening.
I bet laziness has more to do with global warming than fat.
It’s def via the mouth. I did my research my friend….because you see, I am obsessed with fat.
“The entire process takes less than half an hour, and the EndoBarrier can also be removed in less than 10 minutes by tugging on a drawstring to collapse the attachment device and pull out the spikes. The EndoBarrier is then pulled back out though the mouth. At the Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston, a team led by gastroenterologist Lee Kaplan has shown that a miniature version of the sleeve causes weight loss in rats equivalent to a popular form of gastric surgery in humans, where food intake is restricted by an adjustable band placed around the top of the stomach.”
The official website is: http://www.gidynamics.com/endobarrier_technology
On a very basic level weight loss comes down to consuming less calories than you burn. We can either eat less calories than our body needs for what we already do every day, or we can exercise to burn more calories than we consume. But the best approach will be to combine the two.
philips
Criticism is a good thing, but remember of moderation.
doliktrastin8
The “stomach codom” is a new medical technology in order to avoid bariatric surgery. I figure that bariatric surgery is a very agressive treatment for severe obesity.The endoscopic treatment should be a way to avoid bariatric surgery and certainly has low medical complications. Let’s look to the future.
Moderation, h*ll, it is clear to me that you are a fat hating a*shole! Social stigma? You don’t think that we fat a*ses gave social stigma? Open up your f*cking eyes. Stores don’t sell clothing for us, airplane seats don’t fit, roller coasters are a memory and lets not even get started on seats in restaurants or movie theaters. You don’t think there is enough “social stigma” and embarressment there? We don’t get paid as much as you, if we are even hired by prejudiced a*sholes like you. Moderation someone suggested? Just remember a*shole, Karma’s a bitch!
Paula, I don’t hate “fat” people. It may surprise you to hear that beneath my seemingly hard, narcissistic surface I hate no one. When one person suffers or struggles, the entire human race, because of our connectedness, also suffers.
I did not intentionally mean to hurt you or poke fun at you. If you felt hurt, for that I am sorry.
There is certain amount of knowledge and commonsense that I have to possess to do what I do. And I have to tell you this, Karma will never make me fat. Calories do. Everything in my life is done in moderation; it helps to balance my mind, body and soul.
If you’d like to talk about how I can possibly help you, then let’s. In fact, if you live in the tri-state area, come to my gym and I will give you 10 free personal training sessions to help you change your body and perhaps help bring you a sense of joy.
Best,
Sherika
Paula, moderation is a start. People are not born obese, they live a lifestyle that makes them that way. The rest of the world should not have to cater to your lack of discipline. It is worse for me on a plane next to an obese person who’s spilling out into MY seat too! I spent the same price for my ticket and I shouldn’t have to share 1/2 my seat with the overweight person next to me. I spend countless hours exercising to stay lean and healthy especially as I get older. I would love to be able to sit back and blame the rest of the world for not catering to my problems. Just b/c people are trying to call obesity an epidemic, doesn’t mean that it is a disease. I have yet to meet one person who “caught the fat”! Paula, I am sorry if you are overweight and not happy with yourself but just keep in mind that you have the power to change that. It is not easy but is 100% doable.